Because I Love This Job
by words-are-my-weakness
Summary: A collaborative fic from all the S&B fangirls that is being sent to Amelia! As usual, any mistakes, please PM me so I dont look stupid when I send this! Sorry, its all in one chapter, didnt have time to seperate it!


_**Chapter One**_

_**By Hayley Edwards**_

_**Jill Harper**_

The work Manchester Metropolitan Police's Major Incident Team carried out was second to none, although no one could deny that blood, sweat and tears were shed during the process. Arguments, harsh words and a lot of drink got the team through each case. But they did get through it. They always got a conviction in the end, however long it took. At the end of the day the team were more like a family; always there for each other when in need. Janet and Gill went back eighteen, nearly nineteen years. Rachel had only been in the team eighteen months, yet her and Janet were closer than most, with Janet almost mothering Rachel at times, at work as well as in her personal life. Andy had left, and Janet and Mitch's friendship grew. Janet cared about Andy and didn't want to lose him as a friend, but the way he had behaved, friendship didn't seem possible anymore, he began to frighten her, he threatened her job, and there wasn't any way that they could go back to the way things were. Mitch saved Janet's career in a way. Pete 'fathered' Kevin, looking out for him and trying to help him as well as clarifying all the long words Gill used in briefings. Lee was like a brother to them all, always dependable and reliable, and never really had any problems with anyone. DC Kevin Lumb was the joker of the team. She felt like a head mistress at times because she felt she was always telling him off. Sometimes she wondered what the hell she has been thinking when she took him on. Maybe she wanted to prove to her best friend DSI Julie Dodson that she could turn him into a half decent officer. He was good, just needed a little guidance, all the time!

Gill mothered her whole team; pushing them to their full potential, but always there for each of them when they needed her. Her relationship with Rachel was strange; she knew she was brilliant, and could easily be something special one day, but she needed to shape up if she wanted to go as far as she potentially could. Working with 'murdering nutters' all day was a difficult, exhausting task for even the best, most experienced police officers. For DCI Gill Murray, it was even more taxing, having to put on that cold, tough exterior every day, when sometimes all she wanted to do was let rip. They all had their personal lives, which to be fair were a mess, but their strengths were in their work. Each detective also knew how true it was when people said personal and professional lives do not mix.

DCI Gill Murray sat in her spacious office looking out at her team. Although she would never ever tell them to their faces, deep down she was very proud of them all. Yes they could be the bane of her life at the best of times but she would never trade them for the world.

Gill wasn't blind, she knew they called her Godzilla. She took it as affection. She'd be lying if she said M.I.T was her first love. Working at the faculty was always her dream job. She loved that job. She was good at it and because of Dave she had to give it up. She knew she shouldn't dwell on the past because as she looked out into the heart of M.I.T she realises that she actually is happy. She hadn't realised it until now. She loved the work and she had an amazing group of officers around her. People she could count on. People she trusted with her life. In retrospect what more could she ask for. As she sat here in her office watching her team scurrying about their jobs, Gill had a million things she had to do and also have a million things flying through her head. A large glass of wine right now would have helped her to forget about her troubles for tonight. But that wasn't going to happen. Maybe tomorrow.

_**Chapter Two**_

_**By Katherine Brittin**_

_**Gabriella Dickerson**_

The day was long, but now it was over. The detective headed home, to her larger-than-usual house. It had been awhile since Janet Scott had to live alone. The home was now just a house, and seemed bigger without her husband in it. After being married twenty five years she had got used to life a certain way, now her husband has left she has to readjust to life as it was before, well as much as she could with two children, a house and a job all needing her attention. A couple of months ago Janet was stabbed by her friends brother; he also killed his sister Veronica when she was little. This is something Janet has had to come to terms with. Since that day things haven't been going to well for the Scott family.  
A few hours previous; the now quiet house was something you wouldn't expect from the Scott household. Shouting and screaming at each other, with no concern of the time or anyone around them, the married couple argued. Taisie and Elise were sitting in the kitchen as their Father walked in, took the car keys and walked out. They looked at each other 'Where are you going dad?' Taisie asked. 'OUT' Adrian Scott shouted back. The front door slammed. Janet quickly ran to the closed door, opened it, and shouted at him again. From the kitchen the girls couldn't hear much of the argument as it was towards the back of the house. From what they heard there mother had said '...and never come back' although they couldn't be sure. During Janet and Ade's argument the girls had been sitting in the kitchen listening to every word. They tried not to but it was difficult as it was so loud.  
Janet returned to house a little flushed in the face and shaking a bit. Taisie and Elise looked at her. Elise asked her 'What just happened, mum?' Janet didn't reply straight away. She looked down, a few moments later she looked back up. Elise opened her mouth to ask again when Janet said 'Your dad has just gone away for while, he needs to sort something out. Could you two please go to bed?' Janet sighs. 'I need some time alone.' The girls kissed Janet goodnight and went upstairs to bed. Janet got herself a glass and a bottle and walked into the living room. This was the room where most of the arguments took place between the couple. The room looked different now, almost lifeless. It was silent and calm, a contrast to how it was before.  
It was 9:30pm and Janet was sitting in the living room with a big glass of red wine. She picked up her phone and texted Rachel 'Rach, are you busy? If you are its fine, if you aren't can you please come round or call me. I need to talk to someone.' A few moments later she got a reply but it wasn't from who she expected. It was Andy Roper, the former Detective Sergeant with the MIT, the man who she once thought she could have something special with. But he changed; she could have lost everything and it would have been down to him. She looked at her phone again, waiting for Rachel's reply. Instead of Rachel's name on the screen it was Andy. By this time Janet had easily consumed about three bottles of red wine, which in her head was nothing after the day she had just had. The text said 'Janet what's wrong? Why are you texting me, you never normally want to talk to me. I know this was meant for Rachel but I'm not busy. If you want to talk to someone you can always talk to me.' Janet cried again in emotional pain, as the memories of Aide and Andy resurfaced.  
A few minutes had passed since Janet received the text. There was a knock at the door. Janet arose from where she was sprawled across the sofa. She looked in the mirror, flattened her hair, pulled her trousers up and her top down, she then downed the rest of the red wine from her glass and removed the smile that it had created. She hobbled out of the living room and staggered to the front door. Andy was standing there with a paper bag over his head to stop the rain from getting him wet. He handed Janet a bottle of wine which was obviously meant to go into the paper bag but due to the weather got used to keep him dry. It had been evident to Andy that Janet had been drinking and crying. Her face was bright red with swollen eyes, to Andy this was usually the sign that someone had been crying. 'What's happened to you?' Janet didn't reply. She thought she had got rid of him once and for all. Evidently not. Janet slammed the front door shut and leant back against it tearfully. She walked up the stairs and into her bedroom and closed the door behind her. Tomorrow was another day; she would be back at work and could forget all of this, just for a while.

But how wrong she was.

Janet thought over everything that had happened. Had she made a mistake? Of course she had reasons for doing what she did; she wouldn't have done it otherwise. One thing that stuck in her head was what would happen in the end? Would he leave for good, they have had arguments before so this argument was nothing new, although he had never walked out before. This scared Janet. It doesn't take her long to sober up, a few litres of water from the large bottles she kept beside her bed would usually does the trick.

Janet heard a noise downstairs and crept towards the door, making for the stairs warily. 'The girls were in bed; it couldn't be them' Janet said to herself in her head. She approached the Kitchen door, rested her hand on the door handle for a few seconds before pushing open the door with conviction.

It wasn't a burglar.

Janet saw her 'husband' sat at the kitchen table. She took in a deep breath and walked over to him.

"Hello," She smiled. Her face died down when she saw he wasn't as happy as she hoped him to be. "What's up? She asked, panicking.

Janet smiled: "Are you moving back in?" She had all the hope in the world in her. She didn't want to get a divorce, she loved Aide. Even though he is the most boring, dull, lifeless man on earth, he was her husband, and she had genuine feelings for him. And he was, once, a very fun guy. "I was," He nodded. "Then I had a phone call..." He turned around and saw Janet's face drop to the floor.  
"What phone call?"  
"From Andy," As Adrian spoke these words, many thoughts whizzed around in Janet's head.

_Why would he do this? Knob head! Should I tell Gill? No... She can't do anything about it. And I don't want to add to her issues. Maybe I should do something about it. Or get Rachel to!_

"You didn't tell me, you didn't make it clear that you've been having a fling _before_ I moved out. When I was still living here with you; happily married." He gulped back tears.

_Happily married? _She thought. _Happily married my arse!_

He grabbed his bags and stood up. Janet's eyes locked on him, feeling the guilt rising in her chest. "You bitch." He spoke through teeth. At this moment, Elise and Taisie had come down the stairs, waiting for Dorothy to tag along behind.

"Mum..." Taisie almost whispered, moving towards her but being stopped by Elise.

"In fact," Aide carried on, ignoring the girls. "Why am I the one moving out, when you're the one who's been mucking about?" He slouched back into the chair, slamming the bag onto the table.

"Aide! The girls don't need to hear this!" Janet stepped in, finally, protecting herself from anymore embarrassment.

"Hear what?" Taisie asked, attempting to push Elise off of her.

Janet looked from her beautiful girls to Adrian. How has her life come to this? She didn't want her girls to find out that she's been shagging some little twat; cheating on their dad. She wanted to be the perfect example for them. Well, she cocked that up when she became a police officer. All she ever wanted was to be there for them, not to mess up a marriage, and live happily ever after, like they did in fairytales.

"Nothing Taisie, go back upstairs." Janet said firmly.

"Is dad moving back in?" Elise asked with joy. Janet looked back at Aide, her heart pounding out of her chest, the guilt hurting her more than ever. She didn't want to tell the girls about her and Andy. Or that their dad won't be moving back in. It would break their hearts!

"No." He said no pain in his voice anymore, just anger. "Do you want to know why?"  
"No, Aide, you can't do this to me. It's not fair!" Janet strained her voice.  
"Not fair? You cheated on me! You slept with some other man, in his bed! THAT'S NOT FAIR JANET!" Adrian yelled.

"Mum" Taisie spoke, after a moment of silence. "What.. - Is that true?" Janet felt tears rising in her throat.

"Go upstairs, now!" She pleaded, not turning round to see them. She couldn't bear looking at them right now. All the guilt was showing in her eyes, her perfect blue eyes, which were once so innocent. Aide sat at the table, staring at his girls as he watched them piece together the puzzle.

"Come on, Tais." Elise pulled her sister out of the doorway and back up the stairs. Adrian could see the disappointment in their faces; the betrayal from their own mum.

"They didn't need to know!" Janet yelled.

"They deserve to know what kind of a heartless bitch their mother is!" He screeched back in her face, pushing himself off the table. "Don't you fucking dare, tell them anymore..." Janet spoke through gritted teeth.  
"Don't you think you've damaged them enough? Damaged us all."  
"I didn't mean to hurt you, I just didn't think..."  
"Why did you do it?" Hi voice turned soft, fragile. This killed Janet inside. She knew he never went all soft-like..

"Why". She knew she would have to answer. Leave him some pride? "Well, I... I was drunk. And, we had an argument the morning before. I was feeling unloved and disrespected. Andy... He... He cared for me, made sure it's what I wanted. He told me he _loves_ me. And at that point in time, that is all I wanted. Somebody to love me." Janet stood in the same spot, her feet aching but she couldn't move due to her feet being nailed to the ground by guilt. Aides face dropped lower than expected, but by now she had lost most of her sympathy. Oh come on! She gave her point! Her kids knew she was a cheating, lying cow. He had made it harder to look at herself in the mirror, as if it wasn't already hard enough!

Janet heard little footsteps sneaking down the stairs. "Now you know, Can you leave?" Janet pleaded. His face grew pained, aching, tears almost being released. Adrian stiffened his back and remained sat stubbornly on the wooden chair.

"I want you gone. Just go, pack up your things and leave, you cheated, not me, so I don't know why I am left feeling like an irresponsible, shit parent?!"

"Aide...please..." Janet began but was cut off by Aide's hand being held in the air.

"I'd like you to go" he repeated a little firmer.

_**Chapter Three**_

_**By Amy Williams**_

_**Melissa Garton**_

_The pig snapped its large jaws viciously as if he were a tasty snack. He tried to pick up his pace but it was gaining on him fast. He looked around frantically for a means of escape but everything was blurry. He tried to carry on running but his feet seemed to be stuck to the ground. He swung around just in time to see the large mouth of the pig enclose over him, plunging his world into darkness..._

"KEVIN "

Kevin felt a smack across his head and he opened his eyes. The bright lights of the M.I.T office of Syndicate 9 made him squint momentarily. As the room swam into focus and his eyes adjusted to the light he looked round to see most of the team staring at him with a mixture of expressions. Lee was chuckling, Pete was shaking his head, Rachel was smirking and Janet was looking slightly concerned. He turned around to see who had slapped him. Of course, it was his boss, DCI Gill Murray, who was looking neither concerned nor amused. Her face was the familiar picture of irritation as she looked at him expectantly.

"Yes Ma'am?"

"Enjoying your dreams?" she asked, and Kevin thought he saw her lip quiver with amusement before returning to her stony glance.

"Well, I..." Kevin's voice trailed off as Gill reached forward and picked up the sheet of paper in front of him and studied it closely.

"Kevin, is this the report on the CCTV that Janet asked you to write up two hours ago?"

"Y-Yes Ma'am"

"There's more chocolate biscuit on this piece of paper than there is ink!"

"Well I..."

"Kevin, you're a detective of Her Majesty's constabulary!" She looked at the end of the form more closely "And you've spelt my name wrong!"

There was a snort from behind him. Both Mitch and Lee had begun to laugh.

"How many R's in 'Murray' Kevin?" asked Gill, using the same exasperated tone she used to use if her son Sammy got something wrong at the age of 5!

"Errr"

"KEVIN"

"Two ma'am" Kevin said, so quickly that it sounded like he'd said 'mum'

"Correct!" said Gill, taking off her red rimmed glasses, which had been balanced on the edge of her nose. She shot a look at Rachel again who had obviously heard 'mum' as well.

"So why, may I ask, did that slip your memory when writing my bloody name in the box marked 'S.I.O'?"

"I..."

The whole room had now stopped what they were doing and were watching him intently. Kevin sighed, it was _always_ him. He hadn't intentionally spelt 'Murray' with only one 'r'. Surely, it was a mistake that anyone could make? He looked up at his boss. Clearly she did not think so.

"I'm sure I've asked you this before Kevin, but what drew you to M.I.T?"

"I..." said Kevin again. Usually he'd give some witty answer which would result in a look from Gill, followed by the silent treatment for several hours, which Kevin could quite put up with. This time, however, he wasn't feeling so brave.

"Sorry, ma'am. I'll err, print another form off" He got up, pushing his chair back as he did so. There was a stifled gasp and he swung round to see Gill's face slowly screwing up in pain. He had bashed her foot hard with the chair.

"Oh my...ma'am are you alright?" said Kevin in horror.

"I'm fine" said Gill in one swift exhale, as if she were trying to breathe through the pain.

"Can I do anythi..."

"No!" said Gill, shaking her head fast, "No, I think you've done enough" Kevin was bright red in the face, mortified at what had just happened.

"If you could remember not to be so bloody clumsy next time, that would be VERY helpful, and may even save me the amputation of several of my toes"

Kevin nodded, looking down at the floor. Gill looked around the room, nodded to Janet, and then half walked, half limped back to her office.

The second the door was shut Kevin sunk back in his seat and put his head in his hands.

"

"It's alright Kev" said Lee, as if trying to stifle a snort. "You could always offer her some oinkment for it!" and with that, the whole room erupted into laughter.

Kevin looked up and a look of realisation washed over his freckled face. He must have been talking in his sleep. Great. The whole station now knew he was being chased by a giant pig, when he was supposed to be filling in the CCTV report. He tried to play it cool. "What are you on about?"

"Nothing" said Lee smiling. It's just, a little birdy...or should I say piggy" he snorted again "told me that someone was having a bit of trouble in their sleep!"

"What do you mean?" Asked Kevin uncertainly.

"Oink Oink" Said Mitch in mock Kevin voice. "Please don't hurt me, no, oink oink, go away" The room all laughed again.

With that, he got up and walked quickly out of the room with his head bowed in embarrassment.

Gill hobbled back into the office, trying to walk normally, but ending up looking like something had got stuck up her backside.

"Anyone" she waited for silence. "Anyone seen Janet...or Rachel this morning?" she asked, slightly concerned, knowing how punctual both ladies usually were.

At that moment, Janet and Rachel came through the door together; feeling everyone watching them, they both took a seat at their desks opposite one another. Gill's frustration soon turned to concern as she saw a look in Janet's eye that she had never seen before.

"Janet, Rachel" Gill called "A word, in here, now" she tried to maintain her stern, boss-like voice, although she wasn't planning to be as harsh as they were expecting. Both ladies walked nervously into the office and Gill closed the door behind them. Each remaining member of the team tried their best at lip reading and reading their body language, but all failed miserably.

"It's not her fault" Janet began before Gill could get a word out. "Please Gill, let me explain" she gave her boss and friend a knowing look.

"Okay, Rachel, get Mitch to fill you in" she nodded towards the door, dismissing her as a headmistress would dismiss a naughty schoolgirl. As soon as the door closed behind Rachel, Gill turned her head back towards Janet.

"What's happened? You look awful!" Gill exclaimed, not meaning it how it sounded. "Not that you look awful, I just meant you looked upset, I didn't...bugger I'll shut up!" she decided was the best thing to do seeing as she was digging herself deeper into this hole.

"Aide came round last night" she paused, leaving Gill's imagination to run riot.

"That's a good thing isn't it?"

A stray tear escaped Janet's eye. "Andy phoned him, told him I was seeing him while still with Aide"

"What happened?"

"He chucked me out. I had to stay at Rachel's last night, and then I had to get the girls to school, and Rachel gave us a lift" Janet drifted off into a daydream for a few moments, reliving the whole evening when she finished with Andy.

_It was 11pm, Gill had dismissed them an hour ago, it was dark, and the rain was coming down in buckets. It was difficult for Janet to see the road, so she had to drive a lot slower. She pulled up outside a modern house. She turned the engine off and went to step out of the car. At that moment, Andy opened the door and stood in the hallway. A massive smile swept across his face when he saw her. "Hi" he said as she approached. He moved out of the way, letting her walk past him into the open plan kitchen/dining area. "I'm not stopping" she said, pausing by the door. "Okay..." he spoke softly. He walked past her, and went to put the kettle on. "Not even for a drink" she continued. "Okay" he said, with a little more confusion. Was she just going to stand in the doorway then? "Sorry" she said with an awkward smile. "It's fine. He looked at her with his glistening eyes._

_"I don't want to do this anymore" Janet stated. She felt awful, as those 7 words fell out of her mouth. She had to end it with him, it wasn't fair on him - being lead on, it wasn't fair on the girls - their dad had only just left and it wasn't fair on her - she didn't want to jump out of one relationship straight into another, she nearly went home and rang him from there but she didn't have the heart to do that.  
"So that's it is it? Just like that? Why?" Andy had so many questions - he knew they were meant for each other, whether she knew it now or not, he knew it 20 years ago and he knows it now.  
"Time, space, and all the things I've talked about, all those things I've never made a secret of... I hope, I hope we can be friends...but I can't, I just can't...I'm going now" Janet turned around and began to walk out the door, she felt that sinking feeling of what she'd just said, she didn't not like Andy, she cared about him a lot. He had always been there, but it wasn't the right time. She heard him let out a sigh, and she felt a pang of guilt run through her, but she dismissed it. She knew it was for the best. She left his house, and got back in the car, sliding down in her seat. She looked back towards the house, then to the drive. She put her foot down and off she went, back home._

_She arrived at home 10 minutes later. She went to get out the car when she got a sharp twinge in the side of her stomach. It was only there for a few seconds, so Janet just got out of the car and muttered under her breath 'I think I need some food'._

_She opened the door and was greeted by a smell that was sent her way. She walked through to kitchen, where Taisie was cooking what looked like chicken curry. It didn't look like curry, or smell like curry, but it was the thought that counts. "Sit down mum, I know you've had a long day" Janet was bemused, it was rare that her daughter would emerge from 'the black hole' they call her bedroom, let alone actually do something for another human being._

_Janet finished what was a slightly watery curry, she really hoped Taisie didn't want to do anything in cooking, she wasn't exactly Gordon Ramsay! She washed up her plate and went upstairs to her daughter's bedrooms, spending a bit of time with each of them before sending them to bed so she could get to bed herself. She knew they wouldn't actually go to sleep, Taisie would go back on her phone and Elise would probably read. Elise was the clever one, always getting good grades in exams, always studying really well. Taisie was the complete opposite. At parents evening teachers would always describe her as the 'class clown' whereas Elise was always the one they said would go to University and have a good career. Janet didn't mind what her girls did when they were older, just so long as they didn't get in trouble with the Police and didn't do drugs. She couldn't see them doing that sort of thing anyway; they had too much common sense._

"I'm really sorry Gill, it won't happen again" Janet finished as she re-joined planet earth.

Janet couldn't read Gill's face, she looked angry but her eyes said different. "If you need anything, anything at all, you and the girls, you just let me know, alright?!" she asked rhetorically with the first smile of the day.

"Are you still alright for later? Tom's coming in around 11.00"

Janet smiled and nodded, and calmed her rising emotions with a deep breath, before she headed back to her desk with Gill following behind.

"Oh" Janet said, turning around to face Gill again" "What happened to your leg?" she asked concerned, having noticed her doing some sort of 'funky walk' as her youngest daughter would say.

"Don't ask" Gill replied firmly, shooting a look at Kevin that said a thousand words.

_**Chapter Four**_

_**By Hayley Edwards**_

It was nearly forty years ago, but the case had still resounded in Tom Walter's Mind. Something about it ate him up inside, made him feel physically sick, angry and cold. He told himself that he would not resign until the day the man behind the killing of six year old Veronica Hastings, was behind bars. Tom had had to retire early after his drinking became out of control. He wasn't sacked, just given a nudge. When the case was deemed unsolved, Tom turned to the bottle. It helped ease the nightmares and the anger that built up in him during the day. But one drink became another, a bottle turned to two, day in, day out. Tom refused to let the case close and forget about it. But after a few weeks of people politely shutting him down, Tom decided that he would not give up and he would get justice for Veronica somehow, one day. He became obsessed, enthralled by it even. It was the only thing he talked about.

Until a few days before an unexpected knock came at his door, no one had spoken to Tom about anything related to the police; after he retired, let alone the Veronica Hastings case; he lost contact with most people. So when Janet Scott turned up, out of the blue, he was a little taken aback. He showed her the boxes of case papers he had with delight, grateful and amazed that someone was willing to re-open the case. However, he was uncertain of whether or not she was serious at first. No one had ever taken him seriously, why would they after all that time? He had told the detective before him to take them, as long as she was serious and would get a result.

Tom had slept easier that night, knowing that finally there may be the chance he would be caught. He still saw the little girl's body when he shut his eyes. As Detective Superintendent, he was at the scene before the body had been moved. He stayed with her, holding her hand until she was taken to the mortuary for the post mortem. Every detail had lingered in his mind. Seeing a figure of a man just strolling away from the child's cold, sleeping body had caused him to wake up screaming night after night. Knowing that one day, one day soon he may be caught, meant Tom had the chance of sleeping a little better.

_X_

_After two days passed and Janet had begun to make links between murders, with the help of Rachel, and informed Tom of their progress, who in turn had informed Geoff Hastings. She had worked from home with Gill's blessing, and between herself at home and colleagues Rachel and Gill in the office; they had become dangerously close to the killer. A serial killer that dated back nearly forty years. Rachel had burst into Gill Murray's office revealing her suspicions of who the killer was, whilst Janet made Geoff tea in her own kitchen._

_"Its Geoff" Rachel announced._

_"What's Geoff?" Janet asked down the phone; Rachel having not realised Geoff was there blurted it out, and Geoff being fully aware of this, grew more tense, knowing he was about to be exposed._

_From Rachel's end, there had been nothing but silence but she could hear the tense feeling from the kitchen at the other end of the phone._

_"He's got a knife Rach, he's cut me" Janet had looked unimpressed and disapprovingly at Geoff as she held her face._

_"BOSS" Rachel screamed, running into Gill's office. "He's got a knife, he's cut her"_

_The next hour had flown by, and soon Rachel, Andy and Gill found themselves outside the hospital, waiting for Janet to come out of theatre._

_"He was right, he was right all along" Rachel had stammered incoherently._

_"Who was?" Gill asked, her blood stained hand shakily lifting the cigarette back towards her dry lips._

_"Tom Walters" she began. "He knew the killer was still out there. His whole theory...he was right"_

_"Someone should tell him" Andy chipped in._

_"Yes. I will" Gill volunteered, not wanting to go home right straight away. "Does anyone want a lift?"_

_"No, thanks, someone's coming for me" Rachel replied, trying to hold herself to stop her body from shaking._

_"I'll be fine, could do with the fresh air" Andy sighed painfully._

_"Boss" Rachel called as Gill began to walk back towards the car park._

_"Good Luck" Andy finished, somehow able to read what Rachel was thinking._

_'__I am going to bloody well need it' __Gill thought aloud._

__X__

_The next few hours Gill could remember as if she were reliving them._

_Gill knocked on the door with conviction, running a few lines through in her mind before Tom answered. She had no idea what to say, or how to say it._

_"DCI Murray?" he questioned rhetorically, standing in the doorway, holding the handle in his hand for support. "Whatever is the matter?" he asked, this time expecting an answer. He had always been good at reading people; it was part of the job. It was an instinct rather than experience; however, a large part of instinct is argued to be experience. But at this moment, a blind person could see the anguish in her eyes._

_"Can I come in?" Gill asked, trying to keep her sentences short, as not to give herself time to cry, or give her distress away._

_"Of course" Tom smiled a warm and friendly smile and leading into the living room, despite his growing worry. "Please" he gestured towards the settee._

_"We've...I just wanted to let you know..." Gill couldn't find the words._

_"You've found him haven't you?"_

_"Yes Mr Walters, we have" Gill answered._

_"Who is it?" he asked, unsure of whether he wanted to know or not, but committed to his decision now._

_"Geoff Hastings" she said quietly. Tom staggered backwards, Gill not knowing whether it was the drink or the shock, or a combination of the two, but ran towards him and grabbed his arm and lowered him onto the chair._

_"That isn't everything is it?" Tom knew there was more._

_"He stabbed Janet"_

_"Oh my God, the poor woman" Tom grew tearful. "Why? How? Is she...is she alright?" he asked, flabbergasted by the news._

_"She's in theatre; she's lost a lot of blood"_

_"Have you got him?"_

_"We've got twenty dedicated search officers and uniform doing house to house; we will find him" Gill assured, herself more than Tom._

_"I want to be there, when you arrest him"_

_Gill only nodded, fearing any more verbalising would lead to a complete emotional breakdown._

_X_

"Janet" Tom smiled, holding his arms out as he walked towards her. "I'm so glad you are okay"

"Thank you sir" she replied as she gave him a nervous hug. At that moment a uniform officer guided Tom by the arm to a chair that was ready for him in custody.

"How is he?" Janet asked Gill, knowing her friend would give her the truth.

"This has meant the world to him. He's kicked the drink, for good I think, not touched a drop in months. But he's old and he's frail, and he knows it" Janet looked at the man hobbling towards custody, with worry and guilt in her eyes. She felt guilty for having a family; stupid she knew, but there were times when she didn't appreciate them, and times like this, when you realise how easy it is to lose someone you love, and when you can see how easy it is to end up alone, she realised how much she did love and appreciate her family. She felt guilty on behalf of all the officers over the years that had not believed him when he told them that the killer was still out there. They should have listened. But she decided she would do more for him, to help him. What or how was unclear, but she was.

"Geoff Hastings, you are charged with the murders of Veronica Hastings, Lynn Stott and the following women... You do not have to say anything, but it may harm your defence if you do not mention when questioned, something you later rely on in court. Do you understand?" Gill read sternly, meaning every word, more than she ever had before.

Geoff nodded sheepishly. Not regretting what he had done, more regretting that people had found out. But he wanted them to. No one could make sense of Geoff's mind, and MIT had come to the conclusion that he probably couldn't either.

As the custody sergeant took hold of Geoff's handcuffed arms, Tom spoke quietly "Good riddance" and a single tear escaped his eye.

Janet rubbed his arm comfortingly. Forgetting, she asked "drink sir?"

"A large mug of tea would be lovely dear" he replied, having both Janet and Gill worried for a moment that he had relapsed. "Just got something I need to do first" he said before walking toward the exit of the building. The two women were left standing side by side watching the space he had just been in, anxious about what was going to happen.

_X_

Janet made the decision to go after him, and it didn't take her long to find him. Crouched over a small headstone, Tom was hunched over, stray tears wetting his cheeks. Janet walked slowly up to him as not to startle him and rested a hand on his shoulder. He looked up briefly, but his eyes were torn back to where it read

'_Veronica Hastings_

_Fell asleep at 12.02,_

_Aged 6._

_Sleep well angel'_

Tom read the poem that her parents had written for her on her headstone,

_You were sent from heaven to earth,_

_An angel right from your birth,_

_To show the living what it meant,_

_Not to be given but only leant,_

_To carry out God's will down here,_

_All with strength and no fear._

_But when your work down here was done,_

_You were called back to the son,_

_To guide us in each day we live,_

_And help each one of us to give,_

_Thanks to God for giving us you,_

_And guiding us each day too._

_But now you've gone and left us,_

_We shed a tear without a fuss._

_We miss you as each day goes by,_

_And with your help we do try,_

_To carry on with our lives;_

_Memories still as sharp as knives._

_We will always love you dearly,_

_In our thoughts we will not merely,_

_Cast your time with us aside,_

_And to your work we will abide._

_Here I confess I will not lie,_

_With every second that goes by,_

_Each piece of heart we have left,_

_Shatters in longing to have you back._

_You will always be our angel._

Tom lifted his hand to his mouth and kissed his fingers, and then placed his hand on the gold engraved letters on the headstone. 'Goodnight sweetheart'.

_**Chapter Five**_

_**By Sophie Bellars**_

_**Hannah January**_

After opening yet another email Gill let out an almighty sigh. 'Bloody idiots', she thought to herself. Could no one type, spell or use proper grammar these days? It was painful enough having to sift through a mountain of emails, but it really got on her tits when they were awful to read through. What on earth did they teach at school these days? Gill quickly berated herself for the though, realising how old it made her sound, to be moaning like that, hell she sounded like her mother. "Dot your 'i's Gill, cross your 't's Gill, try to write a sentence coherently Gill." As much as it had pissed her off the time she half glad of the constant criticism, it would snow in bloody August before she would find herself sending such poorly worded email like the ones she was having to read now. Gill felt her let out a quick giggle as she saw the spelling mistake the toffee-nosed-twat of a corner had written. "She suffered from sick as hell anaemia" Gill felt a smug grin creep onto her face as she realised that he meant sickle-cell anaemia. "Twat".

But her amusement was quickly cut short when she saw Janet walk past her office window. Leaping into action, Gill quickly called her friend's name. The DCI's minded suddenly became clouded by worry for one of her dearest friends as she remembered the Janet's recounts of the trauma she went through when she found out, as a teen, that her friend, at age six, had been murdered. She had even been told of how her DC had been admitted into psychiatric care, not that she had declared it on her police personal file. Gill had always felt very guilty about that information; the confliction between wanting to do right by her friend, but also playing by the rules. She hadn't reported her in the end. They needed more female coppers, it still being a male dominated environment in the 80s and 90s, arguably still now, however, that wasn't the reason, Janet had entrusted her with this information and Gill would be dammed if she screwed her friend over like that. But Gill quickly reasoned with herself, she was strong, stronger than back then. And she had Ade. "Veronica Hastings." Gill began as soon as the DC walked in.

"Oh yeah?" Janet answered, drawn in by the mention of the name, intrigued in fact.

"I've spoken to Mike Dearbolt, in cold case." Gill added, "It's on their list but way down, so Mike's happy if you want to start mooching about and pulling the case papers together. But, just be sure to keep a day book and record everything."

"Great!" The enthusiasm in Janet's voice was unmissable, showing just how much this meant to her.

"Just be sure not to do too much of in my time, alright?" Gill finished, knowing that wouldn't be a problem, Janet was one of her best, and most dedicated coppers.

"Yes Madame, ma'am, boss." Janet joked but also used the exaggeration to show her appreciation.

"The S.I.O was Tom Walters. Who, they say, would be more than happy to talk to you." Whilst Gill passed Janet the post-it filled with the information she could help but promise herself that she would never turn out like that man: obsessed, drunk and just lonely. Gill knew she drank a lot, but, generally, she knew when to stop. It wasn't an addiction, and it never would be.

"Wow!" Janet exclaimed at the revelation.

"Apparently it is the only thing he does talk about." Gill's thoughts echoed loud in her mind.

"Thanks Gill; I owe you one."

"One, HA!" Gill cried. "Eh, what are you and Ade doing for your silver wedding?" The topic was changed as quickly as it had started, Gill not wanting dwell, for her sake as much as Janet's.

"Keeping quiet about it." The words came out as just a murmur as the DC busied herself by folding the piece of paper in half, repeatedly

"Why?"

"Parties," Janet mused. "Anyway…"

"What?" Gill pushed.

"I don't want to run the risk of getting drunk, like someone I know did at her fortieth, and run up and down the garden, topless, at midnight, in front of her few remaining guests, singing 'I am sixteen going on seventeen.' "

"I thought we weren't going to mention that again." Gill said as she felt the broken memory flicker in the front of her mind. She could remember parts of the night, mainly the early parts, before she had gotten so pissed. But she still had a vague recollection of her dainty dancing and back garden antics. The thing she remembered most clearly was the mother of a hangover she had the next day. Her head ached with the thought.

"Optimist." The room was silent as the two women mused over the memory.

Suddenly, the women began cackling with laughter filling the S.I.O's office, as well as the open plan, communal office shared by the DCs and their Sargent, attracting some curious glances from the few remaining officers.

After recovering from the fit of giggles, Gill inhaled deeply and clasped her hands together. "You won't tell anyone that, will you?" Gill said in the exhale.

Janet simply responded with a shrug of her shoulders and a mock raise of the hands.

Gill inhaled deeply again, put her glasses back on and muttered "bugger" before resuming her attention to her emails, the tune of 'I am sixteen going on seventeen' still whirling around her head.

Memories of her last birthday came flooding back at that moment.

_"Morn..." The door slammed behind Gill as she trailed off from her usual greeting. Her eyes widened. "...ing."_

_"Happy birthday, Ma'am," Kevin called from where he was perched on his desk, threading ribbon through the balloons._

_Lee and Mitch stood up and carried a parcel across to her together, fighting over who got to hand it to her when they reached the door. She took it silently, struggling with the weight, her lips set in a straight line, her expression unreadable._

_"Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you..." Rachel sang, terribly out of tune, carrying a cake towards her boss. It was covered in candles, all glowing brightly, and Kevin flicked off the lights so the cake and Gill's face both shone in the soft glow._

_"It's chocolate," Kevin announced excitedly._

_"Kevin's aroused by chocolate cake," Mitch explained._

_Lee continued, "We've got some sausage rolls in the kitchen too; we'll heat them up for lunch. We even managed to smuggle in some champagne."_

_"Are you... are you going to blow out the candles, Ma'am, or would you like me to stand here forever?"_

_Kevin giggled at Rachel's sarcasm, evidently in a good mood. Whether it was about the chocolate cake or not, they'd never know. "Come on, Ma'am, make a wish."_

_"I..." Gill mumbled._

_Rachel sighed, "Oh, come on, ma'am! It's not difficult! Look, you just open your mouth, and breathe out!"_

_Kevin leant over to demonstrate, and Rachel had to push him back before he caught his tie in the flames. He grinned and wandered back to his balloons, letting some float away up to the ceiling._

_"I..."_

_"Gill?" Janet asked concernedly from the doorway._

_"Okay, kids, I don't think she wants the cake," Mitch raised his eyebrows, jumping up to grab the balloons and struggling to shove them under one of the desks._

_Rachel looked disappointed and blew out the rest of the candles herself, then dumped the cake on the desk and sat down next to Kevin, whispering in his ear. Pete quickly continued with his work on the computer, watching out of the corner of his eye._

_"Okay, I think we should go for a walk," Janet walked in, speaking gently, and took Gill's arm. Her boss kept her head down, but her colleagues could see her shaking. There was silence as Janet helped her out, and then the office exploded with noise._

_"Oh my God!" Rachel squealed, "Was she crying?"_

_"We did all this for her, and she didn't even give a damn? She didn't even say thank you! She didn't even blow out the candles!" Kevin kicked the desk in frustration.._

_He looked at Rachel, and they both looked at the cake, and suddenly they were both tearing off chunks of icing and stuffing them into their mouths._

_"What are you doing?" Mitch gasped._

_Kevin made a groaning sound, his face covered in chocolate. It probably was the cake he'd been excited about. "Eating... mmm... eating the cake, mmm... it's delicious!"_

_"Don't; it took Janet ages to make that!"_

_"Well, Gill doesn't want it."_

_"No, but..." Lee sighed, letting go of the balloons, so that they floated back up to the ceiling again. Pink and blue and yellow shapes, dotted around the room._

_Mitch switched the lights back on and took some icing for himself, "It is quite nice, actually."_

_"Stop it."_

_"Oh, Lee, we're only mucking around," Rachel sighed, but she stopped eating the cake. She could feel her heart thudding against her ribs, and she realised she didn't feel sick because of the sugar in the icing, but because she was worried about Gill._

_"Mmm..." Kevin grumbled, but he wiped his mouth on the back of his shirt sleeve and shoved the cake away._

_Lee looked around, "What are we going to do?"_

_"I don't know. What do you reckon is up with her? Maybe she has a phobia of balloons?" Mitch suggested._

_Kevin looked at Rachel again and they both started laughing nervously. Lee reached for a pair of scissors from his desk and popped the balloons, one by one, making horrendous pops with each movement. It probably sounded like they were carrying out a mass murder in MIT to anyone outside._

_Kevin coughed, "Well, this is awkward."_

_"Yeah," Rachel sighed, "I think I should go and find them. You know, see what's happening."_

_"Maybe you should leave it," Mitch warned._

_"Yeah, but... well, Janet might need my support?"_

_"She might," Pete sighed._

_"Right, I'll go see them, then," Rachel stood up, grabbed her coat and her handbag, ran her finger once more around the rim of the cake, and left the room, wondering what exactly she was going to find when she reached the toilets._

"_Last birthday party I had been with Dave, he made me a cake and blew up balloons all by himself" Gill remembered with a smile as she daydreamed._

"_I always knew he was full of hot air" Janet joked making Gill chuckle._

"_Come back upstairs boss" Rachel spoke for the first time since entering the toilets "Kevin's even made you biscuits. You know it's cruel to disappoint children; and then he'll get all stroppy and sulky like a petulant little kid!"_

_Gill knew it was probably best to do what Rachel had said, although she did not want to admit she was right._

"_I am sixteen, going on seventeen" Janet began to hum as she followed Gill out of the toilets, leaving Rachel completely baffled. "Just don't" she mouthed to Rachel._

_On arriving back into the office, silence erupted and Rachel grabbed the card from her desk and chucked it towards Gill, just as she had done for Rachel's last birthday._

"_Happy Birthday Boss"_

Gill shook her head to free herself of the memories of that day. She wasn't intentionally ungrateful, but as Janet had said 'parties...' Words didn't describe how she felt about them; probably because she didn't know. And here she was pushing for Janet and Aide to have a silver wedding anniversary party. 'Hypocrite' Gill spoke aloud before continuing to de-code another email.

_**Chapter Six**_

_**By Hayley Edwards**_

_**Sarah Pearce**_

Rachel drummed her nails on her desk, listening to another lecture, briefing she meant, from the boss.

The whole of MIT were sporting expressions of concentration, a pen in their hands and their attention focussed on Gill as she brought the briefing session to a close. They were investigating the murder of a librarian who had got himself mixed up with some undesirable neighbours.

"Kevin. Let's see if you can find the CCTV of Moss' car in _less_ than two days," Gill barked at him, her last instruction before retreating to her office.

"Bitch," Kevin muttered more to himself than to his colleagues, but having realised he had the team's attention he elaborated. The young detective attempted to keep his voice low for fear of Gill overhearing but he suspected she had the whole station bugged anyway.

"She's given me the shittiest job again. I found that shot of Woods outside the betting shop you know. It's thanks to me that you could arrest him. And Godzilla didn't even say 'thanks Kevin' or 'well done Kevin'," he ranted, mimicking her voice. "It wouldn't bloody kill her, it's no wonder her husband left," he added as an ill-thought-out conclusion.

There was stunned silence as Kevin finished his tirade. They all had their differences with Gill, especially in the middle of a stressful case like the one they were investigating at the moment, but that was professional. Not personal.

Being the sensitive one, Janet's first thought was whether Gill had heard. A quick glance into the office told her nothing. Gill's face was unreadable, her eyes fixed on her computer screen but – Janet suspected – not focusing.

By the time Janet turned her attention back to the others, Rachel had fixed Kevin with a steely glare, under which he appeared to already be withering. "Leave it out Kevin. Dave left her because he's a shitbag who didn't know how lucky he was."

A momentary expression of surprise fleeted across Janet's face; that was probably the nicest thing she'd ever heard Rachel say about their DCI, she usually complained about Godzilla just as much as Kevin did. Concern replaced the surprise as Kevin opened his mouth to respond but luckily for Janet who was wondering whether to intervene, and for Kevin who was treading a very dangerous line, Gill chose this moment to leave her office. Kevin quickly closed his mouth again and adopted his normal state; desperately trying to look busy.

"Sherlock, with me," Gill said as she breezed out of the room leaving Rachel scrabbling on the floor for her bag.

Janet almost chuckled to herself and the pair of them. As if they really thought she wouldn't notice the look Gill gave Rachel as she left the room, and the smirk that she was trying to hide. For a pair of detectives they weren't very good at disguising their feelings.

Bristol was gruelling. Gill knew the case well, but Rachel knew this was her chance to prove herself as a capable detective and not a complete moron. Three days passed quickly.

The day was long as began to draw to a close as the dark sky covered the streets of Cambridge. The air was different, it muggy but strange, something just didn't feel right; this night was going to be one to remember. The atmosphere of the day had been tense but now was beginning to turn calmer and more relaxing. One or two people sipped their coffee from plastic cups that always gave the drink a disgusting taste, but on the whole there wasn't much noise or activity anywhere. The coffee shop was set back from the main road, meaning the passing traffic couldn't even be heard, unless you strained yourself to hear it. Headlights bounced off of the windows as they sped through the black of night. The moon glistened in the darkness, surrounded by stars in their orbit. It was an amazing sight; one which people didn't often get the time to appreciate.

Below the beautiful sky, Gill sat at on a stool at the metal table nearest the window with her Detective Constable, Rachel Bailey. They had advised on a case together; not Gill's first choice of detective to accompany her, but Rachel had surprised her, she was professional for the majority of the time, and got a result in the end. For Rachel, the experience had also been eye opening; Gill wasn't the tough, ice queen, Godzilla bitch of a chief inspector she thought she was, she was beginning to see her mask slipping. Would it fall off completely? Rachel wondered as she sat stirring her coffee.

"You know when Janet got stabbed" Rachel began, breaking the awkward silence that had been piercing her ears with its volume for the past ten minutes. Rachel continued to stir her drink even though she decided if she stirred it anymore there would be no coffee left. She couldn't make eye contact with her boss, she didn't know why, it was completely irrational, but there was something in her head telling her not to look now.

"Mmm" Gill answered, also stirring her own coffee, getting faster as painful memories came flooding back.

"Well I fell apart, you didn't, I just stood there shaking and babbling, I'd only known her twelve months, you'd known her twenty years, yet it was me that was falling to bits" Rachel confessed, like a child, disappointed in herself, but also admiringly of her boss for being so strong, when her best friend was at death's door. She wanted to be more like her, well in some ways, she wanted to have the strength to deal with so much pain and hurt, instead of breaking down. However, she didn't want to be a bitch to everyone she came into contact with, out of fear of being hurt, she didn't want to put up those barriers to save her heart from breaking a little more, there was still part of Rachel that wanted to be human. Also, Rachel knew she had strong negative feelings toward Gill most of the time, as did many other people, she knew how much this would hurt her if people felt like that about her.

"If I hadn't have been there, you'd have done everything I did; you had the luxury of falling apart because you knew I wouldn't. You'd have coped if you had to. Plus, I remember thinking if this is the last thing I ever do for Janet, and I hope to God it isn't, I'm going to do it properly. That's where your head would have been if it had to be" Gill began but as her emotions began to build up, she diverted the course of the conversation ever so slightly. "The fact that you beat yourself up so much about stuff tells me how keen you are to learn and get things right. You're good, one day you'll be very good, alright?" Gill paused for a moment to look at Rachel. The brunette had decided that it was now 'safe' to look up and put the wooden stirrer on the table. She blushed at the complement, having not received enough praise or encouragement from her boss in the past. Gill knew Rachel was brilliant, but she made mistakes and had to shape up if she wanted her career to last.

This was the odd moment Gill had known was coming all night. She knew this was no ordinary evening, and it wasn't. When did she, DCI Gill Murray ever willingly open up to a colleague, one that she wasn't even that close to? 'Well tonight' she answered her own question.

"I made a really bad decision once" Gill started but realised she didn't want to continue, knowing full well she would have to keep going.

"What?" Rachel asked after a moment's silence. She tilted her head in an attempt to catch her boss' eye.

Gill looked up nervously knowing there was no going back now. "It was when Sammy was four. I realised way back then that Dave was mucking about with another woman, and I buried my head in the sand. I was in love with the man I wanted him to be, not the man he clearly was, and I ignored it, for ten years, pretended it wasn't happening, and if I'd had the guts to deal with it then, instead of later, when I had to, when he went off with..." Gill broke off tearfully, unable to speak that bitch's name. Rachel nodded to save Gill more pain, already completely understanding every word. "Everything would have been so much better for Sammy, but for me as well, 'cause I'd have got myself organised, so I didn't have to stop working at the faculty. I loved that job Rachel, I was good at it, I know I was born for it, and I'd almost forgotten how much 'til these last few days, forgotten how alive it made me feel" Gill stopped before her tears were beyond control. Her delicate hands wrapped around her warm cup and her head bowed so Rachel would not see the painful emotions being played out on her face.

Rachel smiled realising how human her boss was; how she felt pain, how she loved and lost, just like everyone else. They had more in common that Rachel realised; her mother went off with another man, leaving her and her brother and sister to fend for themselves, and Dave had left Gill for another woman. It wasn't the same, Rachel knew, but the love and loss was still there.

Rachel looked away not wanting to fluster her boss, but was upset at the sight of Gill crying; a sight she had never seen before, and was likely to never see again. Gill tutted and tried to sniff back her tears but was failing miserably. Rachel couldn't not do anything any longer, but asked herself what she could do. Whatever she said would probably be inappropriate and could easily make the situation a thousand times worse. Decidedly, Rachel stretched her arm forward and rested her hand on Gill's, the hands that were still firmly grasping the plastic, not-so-warm cup, to let her know she was there, that she understood and that it was alright. She smiled reassuringly, and squeezed her hand gently. Rachel knew she would be bollocked as soon as they got back to Manchester, but at this moment, she didn't really care.

The calmness of the atmosphere had disappeared and the noise levels seemed to build up. Gill turned to face the window and as the beauty of the sky hit her, she couldn't help but smile, tightening her hand to keep hold of Rachel's.

_**Chapter Seven**_

_**By Lizzie Cooper**_

The next few days in Oldham passed without incident. Kevin continued to annoy Gill in his loveably irritating way, Gill continued to tell him off frequently and the rest of the team didn't seem to suspect anything. On the Wednesday afternoon, however, Rachel knocked at Gill's office door, which she closed behind her when she entered the room. Gill looked at her over her glasses, waiting.

"Erm," Rachel began, helping herself to one of the seats in front of Gill's desk. "Could I… Book some time off? In August."

"Yeah. Sure," Gill answered, opening the calendar on her computer. "When?"

"Erm, the 23rd and then that weekend and the Monday. So back on the 28th."

"5 days," Gill observed, her tone light but with a hint of disapproval, "why?"

"Sean and I are getting married" Rachel replied, smiling. Gill looked up, surprised. She hadn't realised things were so serious with Rachel and Sean.

"Congratulations," she said. There didn't seem to be much else to say.

"You're invited, of course," Rachel added. "I'd like you to be there. If you can." She looked as though she meant it.

Gill smiled. "Thanks kid! I'll book the day off for the whole team, yeah?"

"That'd be great! Um…"

"Yeah?"

"You're invited to the hen do as well. Saturday night before the wedding. If you want to. Jan's organising it."

"I'll let you know," Gill replied, "depends what's kicking off here."

"Right. Alright!" Rachel gave her another smile before rising to leave. She looked genuinely happy with her decision. Gill was pleased for her, especially after all the shit Rachel had had to deal with regarding Nick, but she couldn't help but feel a pang for Kevin. He would be heartbroken.

Gill looked out of the window of her office, thinking. Kevin was on the phone at his desk, writing something down as he spoke. He wasn't a bad worker. He'd never be one of the best, like she was sure Rachel would be one day, but he was alright and his heart was in the right place. Shaking herself, Gill returned to her computer, finishing tapping in the details of the time off for Rachel's wedding. Spending time musing about members of her team was not a productive use of her time.

However, Gill found herself keeping a closer eye on Kevin than usual during the afternoon. At one point, she watched from behind her mug of tea as Rachel approached him. Gill's office door was open, and she heard the conversation.

"Kev?"

Even from inside her office, Gill could see Kevin's eyes light up as he looked up at Rachel, who had perched herself on the edge of his desk.

"Rachel," he replied in a would-be-cool sort of way.

"Sean wants to know if you're still okay to be best man."

"Well, yeah," Kevin answered, with a valiant attempt at his usual tone. "I don't really know why me, but he's alright is Sean!"

"I don't know why he chose you either," Rachel teased, "I think he needs his head examining myself but there you go."

"I could say the same about you!" Kevin retorted as Rachel stood up to go back to her own desk. She grinned at him and wandered off. Gill watched Kevin's expression change from jokey to – unusually enough for him – slightly sad, and next second he got up, announcing that he was going to the shop over the road to get some doughnuts, and left.

Brow furrowed, Gill opened her email and clicked on "address book". She entered Kevin's name in the "to" bar and then, leaving the subject blanked, moved her cursor into the main body and paused, thinking. Eventually, she typed out: "Are you alright? I know Rachel's announced her engagement now and… Well, I wasn't born yesterday."

Send. Gill exhaled slowly. She wasn't sure why she was so worried about Kevin's welfare all of a sudden, but the idea of him being unhappy was… Not quite abhorrent, but definitely made her uncomfortable. Would he read stuff into her interference? Would he think that she hadn't meant what she said about wanting to forget about Friday night? That would be stupid, she told herself, because she _did _mean it. Of course she did. He was Kevin, for Christ's sake.

Next to her, her phone buzzed insistently; a text from Chris. Gill opened it with some degree of trepidation – she was on tenterhooks in case he somehow found out what had happened.

"Haven't seen you in a while. Fancy coming round tonight? C xx"

Gill simply looked at her phone for a minute. She was very conscious of the fact that she'd not got nearly as much work done today as she should've and that was inexcusable; Gill did not let her private life get in the way of work. Deciding that getting back to normal was what was needed, she replied "Go on then! I'll come over at 9. Xx"

Kevin returned from his doughnut trip just as Gill was actually settling down to some work. She determinedly didn't look through her office windows to see how he was or what he was up to, staying focused on the task in hand. Nobody distracted her from this job – especially not Kevin.

Next minute, her computer bleeped with a new email. Given the timing, Gill was fairly sure this was Kevin's reply, and her first instinct was to not look at it yet. Then she thought that was a bit too much like playing silly buggers, and besides, there was a chance it might not be. So, convincing herself that she was checking on that off-chance that it was work-related, she opened the email.

"Yeah, Sean's a good lad! (for a road rat) .. As long as she's happy! .."

The first thing Gill noticed was that Kevin hadn't picked up on the fact that she'd known without being told about his feelings towards Rachel. This gave her a sort of warm feeling inside; the knowledge that he trusted her with that information enough not to challenge how she knew it. Maybe she knew him better than she thought – and he her. She immediately clicked reply, and, after typing out and deleting several half-formed responses, all giving advice and offering words of consolation, she settled for a simple, "Good. Yes, that's the main thing!" which she sent and, without further ado, buried her head back in her work.

Kevin didn't reply to her email, although Gill did catch him looking at her a few times – a calculating look that she wished she saw more of when he was trying to help solve a murder. She responded to each of these gazes with a sharp glance, which always had him looking away instantly. It was all very strange, and Gill was glad when they all finally left the office. She hurried out, hurling a rushed goodnight at Rachel and Janet as she walked briskly past them, and threw herself into her car, feeling more relaxed at the thought of going to see Chris.

When Gill arrived at Chris' house, he was waiting for her. He opened the front door even as she was walking up the path and leant against the frame, beaming at her. She smiled back at him, a genuine smile – she was so happy to see him after all the weird things her emotions had been doing this week. Chris had opened his arms and Gill walked straight into them, her smile widening as she breathed in his familiar scent. His arms were wrapped around her shoulders and she felt him softly kiss the top of her head. They broke apart and walked back into his house together, heading for the kitchen for a glass of wine and chatting as they went.

"So where was this job you were on?" Gill asked, leaning against the counter while Chris retrieved a bottle of red from the fridge.

"Birmingham," he replied, raising his eyebrows. "It turned out to be gang-related, after all the messing about. Bit of a disappointment, really. They didn't need to get us in."

Gill smiled wanly. She'd rather have been working on a gang war in Birmingham than sitting in her office trying to get her head round her officers' relationships, both with each other and with her.

"Enough about work though," Chris said gently, handing her a glass. "How are you? How's Sammy?"

"Fine, thanks," she replied, taking a large swig. "Sammy's going away to some festival or other next weekend so he's taken half my bank account off to fart around with in some camping shop. He wants those heater things, big tent, you name it."

Chris smiled. "He'll enjoy it. You might want to hose him down before you bring him indoors when he gets back though!"

"Speaking from experience, are we?" Gill asked, raising an eyebrow.

"My mother hosed me down one time when I came back from a very muddy festival and it didn't do me any harm," he answered, grinning.

"I don't blame her," Gill teased, "I frequently want to hose you down."

"Oh really?"

"Because you smell, obviously."

"Of course." Chris winked. "Shall we go and sit somewhere comfier?"

Gill gladly marched off into his living room and they curled companionably up on the sofa, chatting, kissing and watching telly. It was extremely comfortable and Gill felt the most contented that she had all week. After a couple of hours, their kisses started to get more intense; outer layers of clothing were removed, hands and lips began to wander.

"Bed?" Chris asked her, his voice slightly husky with desire.

"Mmm" Gill mumbled – Chris' hand was much too far up her skirt for her to form coherent words.

"You okay?" he said quietly, joining her under the covers after depositing her on his bed.

"Yeah," she said defensively, attempting to distract him with more kisses.

He pulled back and looked at her closely.

"You sure?" he asked softly. He didn't look accusatory or suspicious; if anything he looked worried.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Honestly."

He seemed to believe her; he certainly picked up where they'd left off fast enough. To Gill's relief, it was as good as always; the connection between her and Chris was still a strong one.

"I love you," Chris smiled as he kissed her goodbye. Normally Gill would've accused him of being a smarmy bastard and stomped off to her car in pretend disgust, but today she found herself saying the words back to him. He looked so pleased she almost wanted to say it again, but prevented herself. Gill Murray was not, and never would be, sickeningly soppy – not towards anyone.

Arriving at work, Gill walked to her office with a spring in her step, looking forward to her second cup of coffee of the day already. On her way, however, she was intercepted by Mitch, who seemed to have come in early for something.

"Boss?" he said, "Can I have a word?"

"Sure," Gill replied, leading the way into her office. He closed the door behind them and she shot him a quizzical glance, wondering with a trace of unease what he was about to say.

"It's about erm… Last Friday."

"What about last Friday?" Gill asked, her blood running cold.

"I saw you and Kevin leave together. And I wouldn't have said anything, but I wasn't the only one."

"What?" Gill asked, not even trying to make excuses – the look on Mitch's face was serious. "Who?"

"Dave"

_**Chapter Eight**_

_**By Jade Boyd**_

Gill took a moment for herself as she sat in her office, to think about all the things that were playing on her mind. She spoke them to herself in her head, as if she had said them out loud, her team would be convinced she was ready for psychiatric help, and they already thought she was not sane in the slightest! Dave was being a twat, she had merely left the pub at the same time as Kevin, but when did the truth ever matter to the likes of that dickweed?

_As I sit here in my office watching my team scurrying about their jobs. I have a million things I have to do and I also have a million things flying through my head. None of which I can share with anyone as much as I'd love to grab Janet or possibly even Rachel and pour my heart out. I refuse. I won't tell anyone anything, not even Sammy. __Why should I burden them?__ Although they always say to me that I can tell them anything, I can't bring myself to do it. I'll just keep them to myself... For now._

_I look at my computer screen, no new leads, just a whole load of unwanted e-mails. I soon find my head lying in my hands on the desk; I lift my head and shake myself awake. Due to the lack of sleep I've had over this investigation; I'm truly knackered! I instantly think to myself that I need a holiday. A holiday sounds good. Somewhere hot. I begin to daydream, then reality hits. __If I take a holiday, who would catch the bad guys though?__ Oh, such a massive dilemma!_

_I peer out my office window whilst sitting at my desk. I see Rachel laughing hysterically at Kevin and Janet looking nothing resembling amused. As much as Kevin is a knob, a day at the office would be feel even longer and would be boring. He lights up the day... sometimes! They all sit there without a care in the world and here I am with the world on my shoulders. I know it's not true about them not having a care in the world but that's what it looks like. They all have brave faces on. Some people say they look up to me but sometimes I look up too them although I wouldn't dare say it out loud!_

_Suddenly, the phone rings. Dave. I feel more weight being placed on my shoulders. __Will I answer it? I have to__. Dave is the least of my worries now but he still manages to annoy me every day. After all he has put me through these last couple of years, I still need to work with him and sometimes that's the hardest job of all! He's constantly trying to take Sammy away with bribes. I know Sammy won't leave me though, no matter how hard Dirty Dave tries. As I hang up the phone, anger rushes through my body. He's coming here. __Oh great, that's all I need__!_

_I watch as Rachel stands up and walks over to my office door. She knocks and I tell her to come in. I pray she has found a new lead. As she enters the room I see she's smiling about something. "I think I know who did this ma'am!" she says ever so calmly. I suddenly look at her and listen to every word she says. As she talks and explains what she's put together, it all becomes clear. Rachel really is Sherlock._

_I have great delight in phoning Dave and telling him he doesn't have to come over because Rachel and the team have worked it out. It's like solving riddles. __Yes, I don't have to put up with him today!_

_As a day at the office comes to an end, the pub sounds like a fabulous idea. We've finally nailed these three mad bastards to the wall by their fucking testicles! For once I feel a slight bit of happiness run through my body and 80% of that weight has lifted. I always ask myself __why I picked such a stressful job with such long hours.__ Even though I don't have an answer for that question, I wouldn't change it for the world. I decide it's time to treat my team. I walk out of the office and tell them I'm taking them to the pub; not one of them hesitated in saying yes!_

_Finally, sipping a cold glass of wine, all the worries and problems disappear for tonight. I'll deal with them tomorrow._

28


End file.
